Learning To Trust Our Instincts

As life continues to roll along, I'm realizing how important it is to trust my instincts with people - ignoring our gut feelings can lead to enormous heartache and wasted years.

It's a fact of life that some humans are intent on taking advantage of others.  They want you in their life only if they can consistently use you for their benefit with little to no thought of being a good friend in return.  And quite often, such people have enough interpersonal skills to fool most decent people into believing that they, too, are decent.

Sometimes, it's easy to identify those who prey on the kindness of others.  But where it isn't overtly obvious, here is a question worth considering:

After spending time with someone, do you feel mentally or emotionally drained?  

I've come to believe that deep within, all of our life experiences serve as a second brain that is quite good at registering other people's intentions.  Not always right away, of course, but within a few conversations, we usually have enough visceral data to make a decision on what is healthy for us.

Where there is a chasm between what people say and what our instincts register as their true vibration, it's common to feel drained in some way; in such cases, I strongly feel that we should take full heed of this dissonance and create a healthy boundary or walk away altogether.  There is no need to apologize.  Send them light and send them off.  If they disregard our wishes, the best response may be no response.

The opposite is also true - when we consistently feel happier, enlightened, more at ease, and even grateful after spending time with someone, our instincts are letting us know that this is a person worth sharing a friendship with.  

When we learn to trust and follow our instincts, we maintain space for more goodness to flow all around us.