Our Value

Much of society teaches that our value is tied to tangible things such as our physical looks, what school we went to, how much money we make, the home we live in, and our mode of transportation.

The truth is that all such things can be taken away from us at any time. Our looks and physical strength fade with age. Our intellect and knowledge can be swept away via one bad accident or dementia. And we all know that material riches are impermanent.

My view is that our true value is our ability and willingness to help others feel cared about.

To listen with deep intent to understand.

To make others smile and laugh from the heart.

To root for others to thrive, and to celebrate their successes.

To bring comfort by showing unwavering support during difficult times.

To spend quality time, free of any agenda other than to be together.

These are just a few examples of our intrinsic value, powers that all of us have within, and that can't be taken away by external forces.

Kyle Cease says that our true value is how closely connected we are to ourselves. We are increasing our value if we are getting to know ourselves better. I would add that as we get to know ourselves better, we become more capable of demonstrating the priceless human powers listed above.

Put another way, our true value is what lies within us - our awareness, thoughtfulness, humility, trustworthiness, capacity to admit when we make mistakes, ability to offer sincere apologies without excuses, knowledge, experiences, skills, work ethic, and compassion for others, to name several key things.

How can we more effectively tap into our true value?

First, it's essential that we don't give a lot of our energy to those who are inclined to regularly compare themselves to others. There can be a toxicity to camouflaged and overt displays of status and accomplishment, and anything that breeds envy makes it challenging for us to access our true value.

Second, we can strive to do at least one thing every day that brings us happiness or satisfaction. Be it making a little progress with a language we're learning, going for a hike, playing a sport we enjoy, doing something kind for another living entity, treating ourselves to a delicious meal, or anything else that feels nourishing.

Over time, as we choose to spend more of our most important resources on being more closely aligned with things that really matter to us, we develop and gain access to more of our intrinsic value.